Fresh off her positively beatific performance in Glee-does-gospel movie Joyful Noise opposite Dolly Parton, we’ve chosen to turn our gaze onto Queen Latifah for this week’s Cheat Sheet, on the basis that most of the BFF team haven’t a clue why we like her so much. And we’re afraid that God won’t love us anymore if we don’t, since He can be a real son of a baptist about these things.

Gospel music gets the Glee treatment in this confused and blundering Jesus-heavy musical, which sees Queen Latifah and Dolly Parton go head-to-head in a bid to see who can be called a “strong woman” the most times in an hour and fifty-five minutes. The music and the quips are great, but they’re not enough to bring salvation to this lowly sinner of a film – still, you’ll be too busy singing to care.

Bradley Cooper and Ryan Gosling star together in new film The Place Beyond The Pines. This has led to an excess of oestrogen pumping into the atmosphere as hopelessly besotted women everywhere elbow film lovers painfully out of the way to be first in line for the ‘Sexiest Man Alive’ extravaganza. But which hunk is better, Gosling or Cooper? There’s only one way to find out… boys, take it away!

Eat a bag of dicks, Bret. It’ll cheer you up.

Ice Age 4 hurtles from one boring and entirely unoriginal scenario to another, justifying its glaring historical and chronological inaccuracies, hopeless characters, tedious plot and joyless slapstick by covering them in frozen precipitation. It’s just a rehash of previous Ice Age themes and scenes from other, better films, but told by prehistoric animals that existed millions of years apart. Sure it’s for kids, but a cinema full of children could only muster the occasional half-hearted chuckle and even the sound of Sid regurgitating something into his paw couldn’t mask the sound of artistic integrity quietly dying.

JOY

There’s no denying that the ‘size zero’ culture has taken over the entertainment industry, and there is now an increasingly huge amount of pressure on film and TV stars to conform to Hollywood’s idea of perfection. But that idea is changing all the time – skinny was in, then curvy was in and now they just can’t make up their minds.

There’s no such thing as a predictable superhero casting – all the best Avengers, X-Men and otherwise pumped-up persons are unlikely characters who stumble into their crime-fighting alter egos just as unexpectedly as do the actors cast to play them. With so many A-list actors now boasting a brush with superheroism on their CVs, we’ve come up with a few new suggestions…

It’s all too easy, with a little bit of education in the matter of the movies, to become a film snob. An art house film here, a B-movie there, and suddenly you find yourself sneering at the current box office offerings, and assuming a taste for obscure Hong Kong horror shorts. Maybe you start wearing ironic, postmodern t-shirts, like Che Guevara wielding a light sabre. And oh, how you hate it when the soul sucking devils over in Hollywood-town remake one of your classics, the one you’ve seen nearly one and a half times!

Why is it that good guys finish last, good girls get the guy in the end and good dogs can save boys in trouble (stop looking so smug, Lassie)? Who knows, but it just keeps happening. Without wishing to give the game away, you can pretty much expect the expected in romantic comedy, Just Wright. But it’s not all bad! The good news is that this film, despite its formulaity, plays with your pleasure zones and leaves you warm and satisfied. Like tomato soup when it’s raining.