Search results for "the hobbit"

  • The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug

    The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug is a horrendous mishmash of CGI-dependent action sequences and poorly-paced unconvincing drama; but rather like a dwarf in a river-borne barrel, it bobs along rather nicely. Also like a dwarf, it carries quite a lot of extra flab around the middle, but its unassailable charisma and magnificent facial hair…







  • Why The Hobbit is like masturbation

    “It can be a lot of fun, but it’s not a game.” Twenty-first century sage Jim’s Dad speaks for us all; but is he talking about the time-honoured traditions of self-abuse, or the oeuvre of JRR Tolkien as projected through the slightly smeary lens of Peter Jackson? Our newest writer Will Donovan is risking the wrath of ten million Bilbo fanboys as he explains why our latest trip into Middle-Earth has more than a little in common with that time your mum caught you balls-deep in a microwaved watermelon.


  • The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey

    The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey is undoubtedly an event-movie, but can it overcome the ridiculously high expectations and accusations of technological awkwardness surrounding its release? Yes. Yes it can. All the criticisms leveled at the first film in The Hobbit trilogy might be justifiable, but Peter Jackson has still created a worthy prequel to the Lord Of The Rings. Big flashy set pieces, enjoyable and complex characters and an accessible yet captivating script add up to a movie you will be proud to one day have as the cornerstone of your DVD collection. You’ll never be so glad to return to Middle Earth.